Review: 1 Train Memoirs

As I strode across the platform of the 1 line at the 110th street station in Manhattan this morning, I felt secure. Though somewhat groggy, I was calm and confident in the knowledge that the 1 line rarely lets me down in the morning. Sure enough, when I reached the edge of the platform and performed the gratuitous yet obligatory sideways bend to peer down the tunnel, there was the next train steadily barreling its way toward me like a large, burly man-friend, trusty and satisfying, ensuring that I would make it to work on time.

The 1 line, tried and true, remains one of the most consistent subway lines in the whole of the New York Metropolitan Transportation Authority, an organization riddled with brainless leadership, with corruption, and by and large smacking of total catastrophe. One can become quite disillusioned by the MTA's lack of good A, but the 1 train thankfully continues to run better than could be expected, possibly out of spite. Though lately rerouted on select weekends and sometimes overly crowded, the 1 has the steadfastness of a workhorse. In fact, if the MTA lines could be likened to Neil Simon characters from Brighton Beach Memoirs, the 1 train is definitely Kate Jerome - overworked, surly, not too pretty, but always there to knock some sense into your day, provide you with what you need, and send you on your merry way with a swift kick in the touche. I would take the 1 train over most of the others any day, although I am a biased west-sider.

Incidentally, The A/C/E, also running up the west side, is more of a Blanche. The cars are prettier, and you're attracted at first, but soon you're waiting forever and you wonder if it's really just an ineffectual substitute for the island-weary 1 line. By similar measurement, the F train would be Eugene - excitable, slightly erratic, a little too eager, and open to all sorts of characters and situations; the G train would be Nora - skipping along with a determined, one-track mind, but strictly for the hip kids; the J/M/Z is Stanley - prone to questionable and shady dealings; and I suppose the S line is Laurie - too small and snooty to really count for much.

Yeah, I need a vacation.

Spotlight: Fantasma Magic

Hidden away up on the second floor of a storefront, behind a heavy metal door, obscured by the bustling of Madison Square Garden, Macy's, and Penn Station, Fantasma Magic is the premier magic shop of New York City. It is the stomping ground of the famous, the infamous, the aspiring, and the unknown. And it is now home to my fabulously talented boyfriend, Christopher Shelton.

my handsome bf

Christopher was recently hired as the store's manager, and it is proving to be an arduous yet exciting and rewarding task. The shop boasts one of the most extensive and impressive collections of historic magic memorabilia, along with all the latest and greatest tricks, tools, books, and illusions. It is a must-see for any magic enthusiast, at any level. Along with all the ordering, shipping, and nitty-gritty of running the shop, Christopher also gets to run a series of lectures by successful magicians that pass through, as well as host birthday parties and rub shoulders with big names in the industry. If that wasn't enough, he has also recently been deemed web content manager and webmaster, so check out their new and improved website.

with Penn & Teller

The shop is also a great place to pop in for unique last-minute gifts for those younger cousins, nieces, and nephews that prove to be so elusive come the holiday season. But don't worry, despite their collection of toys and kits, the store is adult-oriented. So if you're ever in NYC and looking for fun places off the beaten path, hit up Fantasma on 33rd Street & 7th Avenue. It's a fun place to be and the demonstrators will knock your socks off.

Congrats, Christopher!

Movie Review: Broken Embraces (Los Abratos Rotos)

I finally saw Almodovar's latest Cannes favorite, Broken Embraces, this past Sunday, but thus far haven't been willing to let it loose from the spin cycle in my head. However, now that Penelope Cruz's face in that gorgeous platinum pinup wig is popping up more and more all over town, I want to set the record straight: this is not Penelope's movie. This movie belongs to a one Blanca Portillo (pictured above). Even though the obvious main character of the movie is the filmmaker turned blind writer Harry Caine (Almodovar's first heterosexual male lead?), it is Caine's assistant and companion, Judit, played by Portillo, who is really the heart and soul of this surprisingly straightforward and subtle masterpiece. (Well, straightforward and subtle for Almodovar. I guess scenes like the hanging-from-a-clothing-rack oral sex scene in High Heels and the fantastically ridiculous shrinking man scene from Talk to Her have caused me to always anticipate something over-the-top from the Spanish maestro. I only wish I could give you links to these videos.)

Reviewers have said that this is a film about films, but I think it's more general than that. After a very illuminating discussion with C. (who always says what I can't seem to say), I believe the movie is about art and artistic integrity. What happens to an artist when his greatest tool and greatest muse are taken from him? What happens to an artist when his art is seized and bastardized? He is no longer himself; he is changed. To cripple an artist, one must not stop at destroying his life, one must cripple his art. These are the ideas at the heart of Broken Embraces, and it is artistic integrity that is at stake for Harry Caine, not just his life, his work, his loved ones, or his eyesight. In fact, I think the movie valiantly defends integrity in all forms, forcing the characters to prove their loyalties and their own value not just to those around them, but more importantly to themselves. Harry's assistant, Judit, is a prime example of this as she struggles with jealousy, motherhood, loyalty, and buried memories, all from the shadows of the men she supports and adores. She is not an artist, but she is committed to Harry's art, and to that integrity that proves to be so difficult to maintain. She is profoundly human, and painful, and Portillo lets her shine as the paradoxical heroine; pivotal, yet restricted to the sidelines. Like the ultimate appreciator of art, she feels just as passionately, but is without the same kind of release.

Lluis Hamar is also excellent as Caine. He is incredibly natural for an Almodovar actor, masculine and stoic, yet brimming with passion. And don't fret, Penelope is there, too, as a beautiful, aspiring actress. But her character is very mysterious. It's as if she is behind a veil; her character is never fully fleshed out, living only in snippets of the past. She is a curious enigma, much like the film her character stars in. Yes, this movie also features the classic film-within-the-film that Almodovar loves, but with a very mature and interesting twist: the film inside the film is unfinished, broken, like the "broken embraces" of Caine and his lover represented in torn photographs locked in Caine's closet. Yet this scattered quality of the inner story somehow helps make the outside framework more complete. It's a wonderful hodgepodge.

Anyway, I really liked this movie. I have to admit that it didn't really move me as much as my favorite Almodovar installments, like Talk To Her, but I still give it two high heels up!

DIY Venture: Origami Star X-mas Tree Topper

Happy Friday, people! This weekend could not have come sooner, and I suspect that anyone who had an indulgently short holiday week last week was suffering as much as I was through this excruciatingly long one. However, a fun, easy DIY project is one of my favorite ways to unwind into the weekend.

As I'm sure I've mentioned before, C. and I live in a notoriously small studio on the Upper West Side that we adore, despite the lack of elbow room. I liken the whole space to Sarah Jessica Parker's walk-in closet in the Sex and the City movie, post-Big remodel. (I must interject that I couldn't stand that movie and completely discourage you from renting it just to appease your curiosity regarding the size of our apartment. Just trust me - it's small.) Anyway, a Christmas tree is out of the question, so instead we opted for one of those adorable, teeny-tiny "trees" that the tree guys on the street sell for a dollar each - really just a small branch stuck into a slice of the trunk. But it's the embodiment of our holiday cheer, our only decoration, and I'm loving it. And to top it off, I found a great tutorial for an origami star that fits right on top PERFECTLY! C. says it's the best Christmas tree he's ever had! That might be hyperbole for my benefit, but it is pretty awesome:

Check out the tut, it's pretty easy, and you can use pretty much any size paper to make any size star...I was even thinking of making a bunch of small ones and stringing 'em up. Hurray for DIY holiday decor!

For more DIY decor, and not just for holidays, check out my favs: Craftynest and ThreadBanger. ThreadBanger, although mostly fashion-minded DIY, has especially awesome decor projects on their "Decor-It-Yourself" featurettes.

Review: Simon Lovell's Strange & Unusual Hobbies

Good day, ladies and gents. Sadly, my weekend plans to see Almodovar's Broken Embraces continue to be thwarted by unprecedented crowds, difficult schedules, and unexpected naps. Luckily, the longer I put it off, the more that warm, lovely, tingly feeling of anticipation grows. However, though I did not make it to the movies over my Thanksgiving break, I am not without a Wednesday review! I was fortunate enough to be personally invited (through C.) to the hilarious and titillating Saturday night magic show of the well-known sleight-of-hand artist, Simon Lovell.


Simon Lovell's one-man show, Strange & Unusual Hobbies, is small, in that there are no large-scale illusions, and the Soho Playhouse is a tiny venue. Nevertheless, by 6:00 the house can pack quite a crowd, and once the lights are low, Simon delivers big laughs and amazing effects that make you forget you're inside a tiny black box theater. He frames his show as the story of his life, starting out as a young prankster, graduating into a full-fledged criminal, and ultimately ending up as a humble performer. Sharing his perfect bottom-dealing, second-dealing, and other seamless card cheats, he proves why he is a big name in close-up magic. Simon himself is the real show, though, sipping a gigantic glass of white wine throughout the performance and making odd remarks about his mother. His odd British humor is off-color and crude, yet he comes across as incredibly sweet. He is a fascinating contradiction, riding a thin line between foul-mouthed creepster and self-deprecating charmer. It's a strange dichotomy, but it works...just don't bring the kids to this one. Seriously, though, if you want to see some of the most amazing sleight-of-hand right out of the movies (he plays Ed Norton's hands in Rounders) right in front of your face, you've got to see Simon's show. And afterward, he probably won't say no to another drink at the bar.

All in all, I give Simon Lovell two false thumbs up. It's a totally fun thing to do in Soho on a Saturday evening.

This is just an intro to a DVD and doesn't really do him justice, but it's just to give you a taste.

Spotlight: NaNoWriMo

Congratulations are in order for all those who participated in this year's NaNoWriMo novel-writing contest, in which average janes and joes all across the country make a mad dash to write a novel in just 30 days. The organization fuels its contestants through pep talks, support groups, tips, and forums, and provides a judgement-free, super-positive atmosphere where the emphasis is on pushing personal limits, rather than achieving perfection. I love the way they encourage you to write and not edit, to just forge ahead no matter what. For an extremely picky editor like me, it's important to hear that message over and over. So props to the NaNoWriMo people!

And extra-special congrats go to my pal TylerJanuary, who was a writing FIEND this month, completing her zombie novel with flying colors (I can't wait to read it!) in addition to making progress on her memoir, and various other short story projects. Ty, you are so inspiring!! As for me, I sadly did not get all that far in my own novel, succumbing to the usual laziness and outside pressures shortly into the month. However, it was still a great experience, and one I look forward to aspiring to again next year. Then again, why wait? =)

Anyway, in honor of all those glorious novels that were completed, and even the ones that weren't, here's the opening few paragraphs to my ridiculous novel, currently unfinished (can you tell I was reading a lot of Douglas Adams just before this venture?):


Chapter 1: Penelope

As Penelope Brown sat idly at her desk, staring at the blinking cursor on her computer screen, she suddenly realized that there was a very strong feeling in her stomach. The feeling was something like nervousness, but more like guilt. She leaned back in her chair and tried to think of what she might be guilty. Many things came to mind, and the feeling worsened considerably. She heaved a sigh with what she thought was great gravity, but the feeling did not subside.

At that point the telephone rang, loud and jarring in comparison with the rest of the items on her desk. She let it ring three times, as the feeling became still worse. Finally, she answered.

"Hi! This is Penelope!" She thought it was an appropriately cheery and refreshing greeting, or at least that was what she hoped. She thought long and hard about her greeting the day she received her telephone, trying many different approaches in her head. She thought that maybe this particular greeting could brighten someone's day. In anticipation of things to come, she thought that maybe it could brighten her own. The telephone, incidentally, had come with the desk, the chair, and the blinking cursor.

"Oh. Hi...yes. I..." the voice drifted off. Penelope wished vaguely that she had not answered the phone so cheerily. She waited quietly, hoping that the line would go dead. It didn't.

Venture: Thanksgiving

This year, after a few plans fell through, I decided to experiment and make Thanksgiving dinner on my own - my own pace, my own terms. It was a fantastic experience, total zen, and a tradition I will be able to approach with confidence in years to come. I decided to forgo the actual turkey, zeroing in on the fact that it's the most expensive and takes the longest. So we had sliced deli turkey instead, and I was able to focus on the sides: stuffing, cranberry sauce, green bean casserole, mashed potatoes, corn on the cob, and a pumpkin pie. And I didn't ruin anything! I couldn't believe it. I cooked the whole day away, listening to The Carter Family 1927-1934 box set as loud as the neighbors would let me. It was by far the most American day I've ever had.

The original idea was for both of us to cook. Unfortunately, C. had to work all morning, and when he called and told me he had to stay even longer than planned, I was pretty bummed. After all, I was finishing up the food and the box set was almost through, plus I was pretty hungry. But after hearing my disappointment, he was able to nix the extra hours and come right home to enjoy the meal.

After we enjoyed my fabulous cooking skills, we took a walk in Riverside Park (after Central Park, it's the second reason we settle for a closet-sized apartment on the Upper West side) and enjoyed the holiday dusk. What could be better? All in all, I salute my first DIY Thanksgiving with a satiated, dreamless afternoon nap.

And as for gratitudes, I think Blag Hag really summed it up best.